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To Settle or Not To Settle

April 7, 2022
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After the euphoria of clearing my papers waned, the iceberg of ‘what next?’ loomed ominously before me. Everyone around me had a side hustle. I was the only one the god of side hustles forsook. It felt like I had spent the better part of five years hustling for materials, running for lectures, and going for night classes without getting any marketable skills. Hustle pressure drove me to wig-making…but the wig came out as defeated as I felt.

Finally, it hit me.

While waiting for my certificate, I was going to write term papers and projects for students at a fee. I had it all planned out.

Use part of the 3k in my account to print black and white ads, paste them all around schools in my city—and wait for the magic to happen. I told my brother about the plan and asked him to help me put up some ‌posters at his school.

He refused.

A cavalcade of emotions hit me.

Surprise, confusion, and irritation.

‘Why?’

He shrugged. ‘Because it is stupid.’

I was dumbfounded. Here I was trying to hustle and be proactive and this second-year student was telling me my endeavors were stupid.

‘How is it stupid?’

‘I don’t read what you write often because I don’t like to read,’ he pulled a face, ‘but I know you write well and I don’t think you should waste your time writing term papers for people that won’t appreciate it.’

I was touched, but my mind was made up.

‘I understand, but I need something to be doing in the meantime. I’ll print the posters and….’

‘If you print them and give them to me, I will tear them and tell you I posted them.’

He said it so nonchalantly I almost believed I imagined the words.

‘See Uche, here’s the thing,’ he continued, ‘it always starts with ‘let me do this in the meantime.’ Before you know it, it’s eight years, you have a sign saying ‘assurance term papers,’ and your dreams are all forgotten. Be broke, but keep working towards finding a job where your skills are not only needed but appreciated.’

A month after that, I got my first content writing job.

Holding Up GIFs - Get the best GIF on GIPHY

Now I can end this post here and drone on about the importance of having people that believe in you (which is a beautiful thing). However, this is not a motivational post.

A couple of days ago, I saw a very annoying Facebook post. The poster believed people above the age of 30 should not be applying for jobs that pay ₦50,000 monthly. He gave very valid reasons for that assertion. However, I believe he failed to consider that we sometimes go for ‘underwhelming’ jobs because things are hard. Everyone wants the high-falluting job that pays 500k monthly and comes with a company car. But sometimes we have to settle while working towards bigger things.

Going back to my situation, those weeks without a job were hard. I ran out of money and struggled to buy essentials and recharge my phone. But at least I was in my mother’s house. I didn’t have to worry about rent or food. Things would be different for someone fifteen years older than I was, with many financial responsibilities.

Though I worked (and still work) hard to perfect my craft, I have to admit I was lucky. When you write decently today, you can refine your skills and become a ghostwriter, copywriter, brand writer, or content writer and build up from there. The same cannot be said for someone with musical talents—especially now everyone with access to a studio is an upcoming artist. (S)he might have to work jobs outside their field to survive/be able to fund their passions and that is not a bad thing. Many of the greats have done it too:

T. S. Eliot worked a full-time job at Lloyds Bank in London and only quit when he got another full-time job as an editor at Faber and Faber.

Bram Stoker, the author of Dracula, was a civil servant until famed actor Henry Irving hired him in the late 1870s to manage the Lyceum Theater in the West End of London.

Franz Kafka, the author of Metamorphosis, was an insurance banker by day.

Pianist and composer Philip Glass worked as a plumber and a cab driver.

Stages of life.. : r/pics childhood, passions, grief, togetherness

Life is in stages. At some stages, our passions have to take the backseat. A Forbes article categorizes life into four distinct stages:

  • Struggle where life is a challenge with significant risks in meeting your needs.
  • Survival where the role is just for your security and it pays the bills.
  • Success where the role taps into your talent. Adds personal value by achieving or over-achieving goals.
  • Significance which is focused on creating excellence, committing to a purpose bigger than you, and impacting others.

When people talk about monetizing their passions, they are mostly talking about the success stage. Very few people even acknowledge or think about the significance stage. In a talk titled, The Curse of Creativity, Jordan Peterson bluntly emphasizes the need to survive while working on your passions:

‘ Find a way to make money and then practice your craft on the side because you will starve to death otherwise… Find a job that will keep body and soul together and parse off some time for pursuing your creative thing.’

While we may believe in ourselves and have people that believe in us just as strongly, sometimes, we still have to do some unstimulating jobs. I have done my fair share of those jobs, within and without the writing niche—some of them have inspired some stories and articles. Instead of this obsessive need to monetize our passions, I think the focus should be on surviving, while making sure ‘in the meantime’ does not become forever. I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter.

Like what you read? Check out The Sunk Cost Fallacy: Why We Stay in Uncomfortable Situations and Five Lessons for Humanity: Review of Spirited Away (2001).

Tags: passionsprofessionsettlingtalentsthe curse of creativity
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Comments 8

  1. UDIFE IJEOMA says:
    3 years ago

    😭😭😭 thank you for this Nne.

    Reply
    • Ifeanacho MaryAnn says:
      3 years ago

      You’re always welcome. Thank you for reading ❤️

      Reply
  2. Michael says:
    3 years ago

    ‘Find a way to make money and then practice your craft on the side because you will starve to death otherwise… Find a job that will keep body and soul together and parse off some time for pursuing your creative thing.’

    I’m inspired by your textament and quotation extract above. Which legit and cash-generating side jobs can i do online on the phone/computer to earn while working on my 9 to 5 job?

    Reply
  3. Dila says:
    3 years ago

    Reminds me of how I feel left behind when almost everyone I know has a side hustle, everyone encouraging me to get one. But I no wan sell shoe abeg 😢

    Reply
    • Ifeanacho Maryann says:
      3 years ago

      You don’t have to do what everyone is doing. I learnt that the hard way. I tried making wigs and learning how to do face beats. I even considered borrowing money and setting up an arrangement where I ship clothes from Lagos and sell them in Enugu. Needless to say, it all ended in tears—and loss of the small money I had. It’s a matter of finding what you want to do or are open to doing in the interim. Could be YouTube, interior design or writing content for a small medical practice

      Reply
  4. Miracle says:
    3 years ago

    This is the truth, and it hurts😥
    I’m kinda in the “struggle stage” of life, still trying to figure it out. This textament, surely has helped.

    Reply
    • Ifeanacho Maryann says:
      3 years ago

      I understand. I am there too. Some days you wake up hopeful. Other days, you feel glued to your bed and everything seems bleak. In those times, even if you’re just able to shower and eat, that’s a win. There’s something a friend of mine once said: ‘I know where I want to be but the problem is connecting where I am now to that place.’ It’s a gradual process. Some days I feel hurt about it too but what keeps me going is the fact that I have been through and overcome other challenges, both big and small. Hence, this too shall also pass.

      Reply
  5. Pingback: Rewriting Faulty Emotional Scripts: Review of Calculator (2003)

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